The first question goes to you, Senator Kerry. Do you
believe you could do a better job than President Bush in
preventing another 9/11-type terrorist attack on the United
States?
KERRY: Duh.
LEHRER: Mr. President, you have a rebuttal.
BUSH: Jimmy, let me put my brand on September the 11th.
September the 11th been very, very good to me, and I just
want to say thank you to the people of September the 11th.
Ever since, seems to me we've been safer. Got the
multi-pronged thing going on, lots of extra prongs. So like
I've been telling the American people, put a fork in it,
Iraq's done. But if my opponent had his way, we would never
even have jumped out of the fire into the frying pan.
We got lots to be proud of. We pursue al-Qaida wherever
al-Qaida hides. Could be anywhere. We caught Cat Stevens.
Ten million people registered to vote in Afghanistan in the
upcoming presidential election. That's more voters than
Jeb's gonna let cast a ballot in Florida.
In Iraq, we didn't just see a threat, we were the threat,
and we took the threat of ourselves seriously. Because
that's what you've got to do, otherwise you're just an idle
threat and nothing's going to come of it, see. Saddam
Hussein and Martha Stewart now sit in a prison cell. It's a
good thing. I think the American people can see that I
stand for something.
We're pursuing freedom around the world. We'll find it,
hunt it down. Free nations got a role to play, helping us
achieve the peace we want. And we don't want all that much.
LEHRER: Response, Senator Kerry.
KERRY: We have to be smart, Jim.
LEHRER: Mr. President?
BUSH: I think I can speak to my own ignorance, thank you. I
am the president. Everybody says so. I went to the United
Nations. I didn't need anybody to tell me to go to the
United Nations. I just decided to go there myself. I
learned off the address.
LEHRER: New question, Mr. President. Two minutes.
BUSH: How long was my last press conference? Oh, sorry,
Jimbo, sort of got you mixed up with Trebek there.
LEHRER: What about Senator Kerry's point, the comparison he
drew between the priorities of going after Osama bin Laden
and going after Saddam Hussein?
BUSH: Jimbalaya ol' pal, we can do whatever the hell we
want. Everybody knows that. But matter of fact, this is a
global effort. My globe, my effort.
Now in a bit, my opponent's going to yammer about passing
some "global test," and I'm going to poke fun at that,
Jimmy Dean, because frankly I was too busy at Yale or
wherever it was for some fancy-pants global test, and a
hunnerd bucks says Tweeter had it covered anyway, didn't
you, Tweeter?
But did my opponent serve on the front lines of a football
field? Anybody ever see him at cheerleading duty? We're
facing a bunch of folks who hate us for our cheerleading.
Iraq is where it's at. Gimme an "I"! Gimme a bunch of them
other letters, too.
LEHRER: Senator Kerry, 5 seconds.
KERRY: Iraq was not even close to the center of the war on
terror before the president invaded it.
BUSH: Can I respond to that?
LEHRER: I doubt it.
BUSH: How can you lead this country to succeed in Iraq
unless you're in Iraq to begin with? It's just common
sense, Jim-Jam!
LEHRER: Senator Kerry, what would you do to increase the
homeland security of the United States?
KERRY: Jim, this president thought it was more important to
give the wealthiest people in America a tax cut rather than
invest in homeland security. I believe in protecting
America first.
LEHRER: Mr. President.
BUSH: How he's going to pay for all these promises if he's
not willing to make rich folks even richer, run up the
biggest deficit in history, and put 2.8 million people out
of work? It's like a huge ... gap. Can you see the gap,
Jim-bob?
LEHRER: Yes, it's very ... apparent, sir.
BUSH: Jim-a-ling, the way to protect this homeland is to
stay on the offense. I believe we've been very offensive.
We got the FBI almost talking to each other. We're having
fun trying out some counterterrorism stuff. I been home 38
times just to clear brush out of the way. If there's any
terrorists in there, I'll find 'em. Barney'll find 'em.
LEHRER: OK. Here on earth, Senator?
KERRY: We didn't need that tax cut. America needed to be
safe.
BUSH: Hey! I wake up every day thinking, "How do I protect
America? How?" Then somebody tells me. And they bring me
breakfast. That's my job. I'm the president. I work with
Director Mueller of the FBI. Director Mueller comes in to
my office when I'm in Washington just eating my eggs. He
comes every morning. He talks to me about how to protect
us. I like Director Mueller. He is nice to me.
LEHRER: Mr. President, what criteria would you use to
determine when to start bringing U.S. troops home from Iraq?
BUSH: Let me tell you something I DO know, Diamond Jim. The
way for Iraqi people to be safe is for every Iraqi who
wants a job to have a job. And health care, a first-class
education, clean water. We're turning a corner -- mortaring
every corner -- cornering mourners. Somethin' like that.
And so the best indication about when we can bring our
troops home -- which I really want to do -- but I don't
want to do so for the sake of bringing them home -- I want
to do so because we've achieved an objective -- and that's
not the issue here -- is, say, did you hear the one about
the OB-GYNs who weren't able to practice their love with
women all over this country?

The first question goes to you, Senator Kerry. Do you believe you could do a
better job than President Bush in preventing another 9/11-type terrorist attack
on the United States?
KERRY: Duh.
LEHRER: Mr. President, you have a rebuttal.
BUSH: Jimmy, let me put my brand on September the 11th. September the 11th been
very, very good to me, and I just want to say thank you to the people of
September the 11th. Ever since, seems to me we've been safer. Got the
multi-pronged thing going on, lots of extra prongs. So like I've been telling
the American people, put a fork in it, Iraq's done. But if my opponent had his
way, we would never even have jumped out of the fire into the frying pan.
We got lots to be proud of. We pursue al-Qaida wherever al-Qaida hides. Could be
anywhere. We caught Cat Stevens. Ten million people registered to vote in
Afghanistan in the upcoming presidential election. That's more voters than Jeb's
gonna let cast a ballot in Florida.
In Iraq, we didn't just see a threat, we were the threat, and we took the threat
of ourselves seriously. Because that's what you've got to do, otherwise you're
just an idle threat and nothing's going to come of it, see. Saddam Hussein and
Martha Stewart now sit in a prison cell. It's a good thing. I think the American
people can see that I stand for something.
We're pursuing freedom around the world. We'll find it, hunt it down. Free
nations got a role to play, helping us achieve the peace we want. And we don't
want all that much.
LEHRER: Response, Senator Kerry.
KERRY: We have to be smart, Jim.
LEHRER: Mr. President?
BUSH: I think I can speak to my own ignorance, thank you. I am the president.
Everybody says so. I went to the United Nations. I didn't need anybody to tell
me to go to the United Nations. I just decided to go there myself. I learned off
the address.
LEHRER: New question, Mr. President. Two minutes.
BUSH: How long was my last press conference? Oh, sorry, Jimbo, sort of got you
mixed up with Trebek there.
LEHRER: What about Senator Kerry's point, the comparison he drew between the
priorities of going after Osama bin Laden and going after Saddam Hussein?
BUSH: Jimbalaya ol' pal, we can do whatever the hell we want. Everybody knows
that. But matter of fact, this is a global effort. My globe, my effort.
Now in a bit, my opponent's going to yammer about passing some "global test,"
and I'm going to poke fun at that, Jimmy Dean, because frankly I was too busy at
Yale or wherever it was for some fancy-pants global test, and a hunnerd bucks
says Tweeter had it covered anyway, didn't you, Tweeter?
But did my opponent serve on the front lines of a football field? Anybody ever
see him at cheerleading duty? We're facing a bunch of folks who hate us for our
cheerleading. Iraq is where it's at. Gimme an "I"! Gimme a bunch of them other
letters, too.
LEHRER: Senator Kerry, 5 seconds.
KERRY: Iraq was not even close to the center of the war on terror before the
president invaded it.
BUSH: Can I respond to that?
LEHRER: I doubt it.
BUSH: How can you lead this country to succeed in Iraq unless you're in Iraq to
begin with? It's just common sense, Jim-Jam!
LEHRER: Senator Kerry, what would you do to increase the homeland security of
the United States?
KERRY: Jim, this president thought it was more important to give the wealthiest
people in America a tax cut rather than invest in homeland security. I believe
in protecting America first.
LEHRER: Mr. President.
BUSH: How he's going to pay for all these promises if he's not willing to make
rich folks even richer, run up the biggest deficit in history, and put 2.8
million people out of work? It's like a huge ... gap. Can you see the gap,
Jim-bob?
LEHRER: Yes, it's very ... apparent, sir.
BUSH: Jim-a-ling, the way to protect this homeland is to stay on the offense. I
believe we've been very offensive. We got the FBI almost talking to each other.
We're having fun trying out some counterterrorism stuff. I been home 38 times
just to clear brush out of the way. If there's any terrorists in there, I'll
find 'em. Barney'll find 'em.
LEHRER: OK. Here on earth, Senator?
KERRY: We didn't need that tax cut. America needed to be safe.
BUSH: Hey! I wake up every day thinking, "How do I protect America? How?" Then
somebody tells me. And they bring me breakfast. That's my job. I'm the
president. I work with Director Mueller of the FBI. Director Mueller comes in to
my office when I'm in Washington just eating my eggs. He comes every morning. He
talks to me about how to protect us. I like Director Mueller. He is nice to me.
LEHRER: Mr. President, what criteria would you use to determine when to start
bringing U.S. troops home from Iraq?
BUSH: Let me tell you something I DO know, Diamond Jim. The way for Iraqi people
to be safe is for every Iraqi who wants a job to have a job. And health care, a
first-class education, clean water. We're turning a corner -- mortaring every
corner -- cornering mourners. Somethin' like that.
And so the best indication about when we can bring our troops home -- which I
really want to do -- but I don't want to do so for the sake of bringing them
home -- I want to do so because we've achieved an objective -- and that's not
the issue here -- is, say, did you hear the one about the OB-GYNs who weren't
able to practice their love with women all over this country?

S. O. Damocles wrote:
LEHRER: Just 31 more days of this, Senator Kerry.
KERRY: Thank you, Jim.
LEHRER: Sir?
BUSH: I think it's worthy for a follow-up.
LEHRER: You do that, sir.
BUSH: My opponent says help is on the way, but what kind of message does that
send to the troops that I have committed to harm's way?
LEHRER: Senator Kerry, was the rush to war a colossal misjudgment or has the
quagmire been a catastrophic success?
BUSH: Wait, I know this one!
KERRY: I believe that when you know something's going wrong, you make it right.
I believe that we have to win this. The president and I have always agreed on
that.
BUSH: Hey, look what I can do with my upper lip.
KERRY: But I also laid out a very strict series of things we needed to do in
order to proceed from a position of strength. They didn't do the planning.
BUSH: But what I really like, see, is this thing with the tongue.
KERRY: When the Secretary General Kofi Annan offered the United Nations, he
said, "No, no, we'll go do this alone."
BUSH: Nuh-huh! Rummy was there, too. Where is Rummy?
KERRY: To save Halliburton the spoils of war, they actually issued a memorandum
from the Defense Department saying, "If you weren't with us in the war, don't
bother applying for any construction." That's not a way to invite people.
BUSH: Is so!
LEHRER: Ninety seconds, Mr. President, not including time to pack a few things.
BUSH: My opponent says we didn't have any allies in this war. What's he say t

S. O. Damocles wrote:

S. O. Damocles wrote:

On Fri, 1 Oct 2004 16:13:49 -0600, "S. O. Damocles"
<so@damocl.es> wrote:

Dave Thomson wrote:

Dave Thomson wrote:
The first question goes to you, Senator Kerry. Do you
believe you could do a better job than President Bush in
preventing another 9/11-type terrorist attack on the
United
States?
KERRY: Duh.
LEHRER: Mr. President, you have a rebuttal.
BUSH: Jimmy, let me put my brand on September the 11th.
September the 11th been very, very good to me, and I just
want to say thank you to the people of September the 11th.
Ever since, seems to me we've been safer. Got the
multi-pronged thing going on, lots of extra prongs. So
like
I've been telling the American people, put a fork in it,
Iraq's done. But if my opponent had his way, we would
never
even have jumped out of the fire into the frying pan.
We got lots to be proud of. We pursue al-Qaida wherever
al-Qaida hides. Could be anywhere. We caught Cat Stevens.
Ten million people registered to vote in Afghanistan in
the
upcoming presidential election. That's more voters than
Jeb's gonna let cast a ballot in Florida.
In Iraq, we didn't just see a threat, we were the threat,
and we took the threat of ourselves seriously. Because
that's what you've got to do, otherwise you're just an
idle
threat and nothing's going to come of it, see. Saddam
Hussein and Martha Stewart now sit in a prison cell. It's
a
good thing. I think the American people can see that I
stand for something.
We're pursuing freedom around the world. We'll find it,
hunt it down. Free nations got a role to play, helping us
achieve the peace we want. And we don't want all that
much.
LEHRER: Response, Senator Kerry.
KERRY: We have to be smart, Jim.
LEHRER: Mr. President?
BUSH: I think I can speak to my own ignorance, thank you.
I
am the president. Everybody says so. I went to the United
Nations. I didn't need anybody to tell me to go to the
United Nations. I just decided to go there myself. I
learned off the address.
LEHRER: New question, Mr. President. Two minutes.
BUSH: How long was my last press conference? Oh, sorry,
Jimbo, sort of got you mixed up with Trebek there.
LEHRER: What about Senator Kerry's point, the comparison
he
drew between the priorities of going after Osama bin Laden
and going after Saddam Hussein?
BUSH: Jimbalaya ol' pal, we can do whatever the hell we
want. Everybody knows that. But matter of fact, this is a
global effort. My globe, my effort.
Now in a bit, my opponent's going to yammer about passing
some "global test," and I'm going to poke fun at that,
Jimmy Dean, because frankly I was too busy at Yale or
wherever it was for some fancy-pants global test, and a
hunnerd bucks says Tweeter had it covered anyway, didn't
you, Tweeter?
But did my opponent serve on the front lines of a football
field? Anybody ever see him at cheerleading duty? We're
facing a bunch of folks who hate us for our cheerleading.
Iraq is where it's at. Gimme an "I"! Gimme a bunch of them
other letters, too.
LEHRER: Senator Kerry, 5 seconds.
KERRY: Iraq was not even close to the center of the war on
terror before the president invaded it.
BUSH: Can I respond to that?
LEHRER: I doubt it.
BUSH: How can you lead this country to succeed in Iraq
unless you're in Iraq to begin with? It's just common
sense, Jim-Jam!
LEHRER: Senator Kerry, what would you do to increase the
homeland security of the United States?
KERRY: Jim, this president thought it was more important
to
give the wealthiest people in America a tax cut rather
than
invest in homeland security. I believe in protecting
America first.
LEHRER: Mr. President.
BUSH: How he's going to pay for all these promises if he's
not willing to make rich folks even richer, run up the
biggest deficit in history, and put 2.8 million people out
of work? It's like a huge ... gap. Can you see the gap,
Jim-bob?
LEHRER: Yes, it's very ... apparent, sir.
BUSH: Jim-a-ling, the way to protect this homeland is to
stay on the offense. I believe we've been very offensive.
We got the FBI almost talking to each other. We're having
fun trying out some counterterrorism stuff. I been home 38
times just to clear brush out of the way. If there's any
terrorists in there, I'll find 'em. Barney'll find 'em.
LEHRER: OK. Here on earth, Senator?
KERRY: We didn't need that tax cut. America needed to be
safe.
BUSH: Hey! I wake up every day thinking, "How do I protect
America? How?" Then somebody tells me. And they bring me
breakfast. That's my job. I'm the president. I work with
Director Mueller of the FBI. Director Mueller comes in to
my office when I'm in Washington just eating my eggs. He
comes every morning. He talks to me about how to protect
us. I like Director Mueller. He is nice to me.
LEHRER: Mr. President, what criteria would you use to
determine when to start bringing U.S. troops home from
Iraq?
BUSH: Let me tell you something I DO know, Diamond Jim.
The
way for Iraqi people to be safe is for every Iraqi who
wants a job to have a job. And health care, a first-class
education, clean water. We're turning a corner --
mortaring
every corner -- cornering mourners. Somethin' like that.
And so the best indication about when we can bring our
troops home -- which I really want to do -- but I don't
want to do so for the sake of bringing them home -- I want
to do so because we've achieved an objective -- and that's
not the issue here -- is, say, did you hear the one about
the OB-GYNs who weren't able to practice their love with
women all over this country?
LEHRER: Just 31 more days of this, Senator Kerry.
KERRY: Thank you, Jim.
LEHRER: Sir?
BUSH: I think it's worthy for a follow-up.
LEHRER: You do that, sir.
BUSH: My opponent says help is on the way, but what kind
of message does that send to the troops that I have
committed to harm's way?
LEHRER: Senator Kerry, was the rush to war a colossal
misjudgment or has the quagmire been a catastrophic
success?
BUSH: Wait, I know this one!
KERRY: I believe that when you know something's going
wrong, you make it right. I believe that we have to win
this. The president and I have always agreed on that.
BUSH: Hey, look what I can do with my upper lip.
KERRY: But I also laid out a very strict series of things
we needed to do in order to proceed from a position of
strength. They didn't do the planning.
BUSH: But what I really like, see, is this thing with the
tongue.
KERRY: When the Secretary General Kofi Annan offered the
United Nations, he said, "No, no, we'll go do this alone."
BUSH: Nuh-huh! Rummy was there, too. Where i

Dave Thomson wrote: